|Taken with Canon EOS 50D & Sigma 17-70mm lens.|
Being pregnant has taught me that I am capable of much more than I thought. Since finding out I was pregnant I've been saying every week that there is no way that I can possibly do this. That there is no way that I can possible handle more pain & awkwardness, that my swollen legs & feet couldn't possible carry any more weight, that I can't handle another second of this emotional roller-coaster. And yet, here I am. Today there is almost exactly three months left until my due date, and I'm still here, still handling it. I'm still going to work in a demanding profession almost every day, still writing, still photographing, still living. Things have been hard, but I haven't died. I'm sure that things will still get much harder before this pregnancy is over, and I will still make it through.
Being pregnant has also taught me to know when it is worth persevering. Sometimes if you just keep fighting then walls fall down, and things finally get easier. And sometimes it's worth realizing that if you keep fighting you'll just be cracking your head against those walls over and over, and things will only get harder. Those are the times where it is better to step back, rest, take care of yourself, and save your strength for the next battle. For example, things are far easier when you accept the fact that you're sick as soon as it happens, instead of a week later, and go straight to the Doctor. You know, not that I'm speaking from personal experience or anything. I'm still trying to find the balance, but I'm learning not to push on when perseverance will only be detrimental to my health.
As I type this right now, I'm sitting on my lounge-room floor, after coming home from work. I feel pretty miserable, and I'm in a fair amount of pain after a night & morning of being pummeled from the inside. I'm exhausted, and I have a big headache, and it's impossible to get comfortable in any position But I know that I am capable of getting through this. And I know that tomorrow I'll be grateful that I stopped pushing myself today, and listened to my body tell me it needed a rest.